Mrs. Ram's Jams

Tag: teacher problems

• Teaching Fail: When Acronyms Backfire

  Posted at 9:32 am by Mrs. Ram Jam, on February 20, 2021

  

  My students and I have been working on argumentative texts, and I swore on Facebook not too long ago that I would ensure my students would never forget how to evaluate an argument and a source.

  So I turned to Google while lesson planning and discovered the CRAAP method for examining sources. All you have to do is ask yourself is this source CRAAP to analyze for currency, relevance, authority, accuracy, and purpose–and voila, the children remember how to evaluate a source! And they get to say CRAAP in the classroom, so it makes them feel like they can cuss but actually aren’t! Students love that cusp of danger feeling! 

  And my teacher soul radiated warm fuzzies every time I heard them say CRAAP while discussing texts about failure.

  CRAAP never sounded so good! CRAAP was magic! They were learning! They would know forever how to evaluate a resource!

  Well.

  It backfired.

  While my students did test corrections yesterday, I examined exit tickets that analyzed if a failure fluff piece from Medium.com was a compelling argument.

  What did my students do in their formal writing???

  Used the word CRAAP–EVERYWHERE.

  I audibly groaned everytime I came across a sentence that said “this source isn’t CRAAP.”

  Not only did they come up with incorrect answers (sigh, only like five kids said the source and the argument itself was crappy), they actually thought saying CRAAP in their writing was a brilliant idea!!!

  After having done a badass job of teaching how to evaluate sources and arguments using articles about failure, I WAS AND AM THE FAILURE AND IT MADE ME FEEL CRAPPY.

  Crap. Crap. Crap. Extra Crap.

  What if they do that on their benchmark???? Or god forbid the LEAP test????

  How do I get the CRAAP out of them?

  Well, that sounded terrible, but you know what I mean!

  Looks like they’re in for a crappy Tuesday because they’re going to be rewriting those exit tickets. 

  (Sidebar:  When I looked at these same exit tickets, so many students kept referring to the author by his first name. I asked my fourth block why–because they fully know to use the author’s last name. Their response? His last name was too hard to spell so it was easier to use his first name.)

  

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  Posted in education, teaching, Uncategorized | 2 Comments | Tagged education, funny, teacher, teacher problems, teaching

• A Teacher Tale: Teaching During a Pandemic Update #1

  Posted at 10:25 am by Mrs. Ram Jam, on October 17, 2020

  

  Don’t get me wrong, pandemic teaching is rough, an understatement, but my teacher life got a gazillion times easier last week.

  My school had its fifth first day of school last week. What a weird thing to type, but it’s 2020.  Here are the five first days we’ve had:

  1. The first day for Group One students.
  2. The first day for Group Two students.
  3. The first day teaching in-person and at-home learners.
  4. The first day with both Groups One and Two on campus.
  5. The first day for previously at-home learners.

  At the first nine weeks’ end, our Home Based Virtual Learners (HBVLs) had the option to come back to physical school, and so many did. And while it’s fantastic to finally meet them IRL–cue me squealing in excitement through my mask while taking a HBVL’s temperature last Wednesday Jayda!!!!! It’s so nice to meet you in real life! Look at you!–It. Was. So. Strange.

  I’d just been teaching heads and necks, sometimes just eyebrows and foreheads, and instead of floating heads eerily levitating through the hallways on Wednesday morning like a Disney Channel show’s terrible Halloween episode, those heads were connected to BODIES. Some of my HBVL boys are GIANT, and it completely caught me off guard.

  And something that didn’t catch me off guard–the freedom afforded by being unchained to my computer screen for four blocks. Because with more HBVLs on campus, administration gave us the go-ahead to create a virtual school schedule, so I only teach virtually during third block now. 

  

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  I can stand up if I want. I can move around more, even though I’m still keeping my distance. I don’t have to constantly monitor the Google Meet chat, my email, and Impero (our student technology monitoring software) every single class. I don’t have to shut down a Meet at the end of every class and start a new one while trying to make sure the in-person students are social distancing, know what’s due the following day, and are walking into the hallway on time. There’s more normalcy, but I know it’s possibly short-lived with fall’s onset and increasing numbers of COVID-19 throughout the country.

  And while those students returning to school has made teaching a gazillion times easier, other aspects of more students on campus are troublesome:

  

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  • More students means less space for social distancing in the hallways and in the classrooms.
  • More students aren’t wearing their masks properly.
  • More students are sharing supplies and food when they aren’t supposed to.
  • More students are sitting in cramped classrooms without their masks on eating lunch.
  • More students means going through more sanitizing wipes, and who knows if and when we will run out. 
  • More students means more are showing up to school sick even though they should stay home.
  • More students is harder to manage than fewer students.
  • More students makes it appear like the coronavirus is disappearing when it’s not. 

  And like I said, I’m ecstatic more students are back and actual teaching is easier, but we can’t forget that this isn’t over yet. Please do your part to help keep all students, teachers, and everyone else safe. 

  There’s only so much teachers can do. 

  

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  Posted in teaching, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged teacher problems, teaching, teaching during a pandemic, teaching middle school

• A Teacher Tale: What Teachers Really Think About Parent Emails

  Posted at 9:22 am by Mrs. Ram Jam, on October 10, 2020

  

  Hey Parents and Guardians,

  We teachers are more than happy to answer your questions and concerns via email, but before you hit send, could you ask yourself a couple of questions first?

  Before you send that email to your child’s teacher, is it kind?

  We are working our educator booties off this year.

  A mean email can derail our entire day and even week. We cry over these emails. We lose sleep over these emails. We have panic attacks over these emails. We might even turn a little mean ourselves when we get these emails and lash out at our own loved ones in misdirected anger.

  We then have to respond to an unkind email, try to turn the situation around, and wait on pins and needles for another response, which again, could be an angry one. 

  It’s a vicious cycle.

  And before you send that email to your child’s teacher, can you find the information somewhere else?

  We are working our educator booties off this year, and parent emails create more work for teachers.

  Often times when you email us, the answers to the questions you’re asking have already been given to you. If you look on PowerSchool you can see the answer to why Johnny has an F. He didn’t complete three test grade assignments, and there’s a note for every single missed assignment. If you’re questioning our late work policies, the answer might be on the syllabus, which you actually signed off on, stating that you read and understood the policies laid out on it. 

  And before you send that email to your child’s teacher, consider if it might be better to come in for a face to face (or a Zoom) conference with all your child’s teachers.

  We are working our educator booties off this year, and parent emails create more work for teachers.

  It takes a lot less time for us to talk about your concerns versus us writing an email back.

  An email that you wrote that maybe took you two minutes to compose can devour our entire 75 minute planning period. Yes, it can really take that long to reacquaint ourselves with your child’s work, write a thoughtful detailed response, and proofread until we go cross eyed–because heaven forbid an unsightly typo exists in it that you could use against us, to further prove your point that we’re incompetent.

  And before you send that email to your child’s teacher, and this one is going to be hard to swallow folks so prepare yourselves, ask yourself, could your child be lying to you?

  Children lie. All. Of. The. Time. 

  They cheat. They plagiarize. They fib about why work isn’t done and tell tall tales about their assignments being done when they’re not. 

  They’ll claim that teachers aren’t helping them and that teachers don’t like them and that teachers are mean and and and and and and and. 

  And while occasionally these claims might be true, more often than not, they aren’t.

  And then when we point out these things are untrue, we still aren’t believed sometimes. 

  And before you send that email to your child’s teacher, are you a teacher too?

  These are the worst emails, emails from parents who are teachers too. 

  Have I sent a snooty, condescending email to one of Little Thing’s teachers?

  Yes.

  And I’m terribly sorry. I don’t know everything, I’ve never been in your classroom, and it was a really shitty thing to do.

  I’m trying to be better because I know how terrible parent emails can be.

  So before you email your child’s teacher ask yourself:

  Is it kind?

  Can I find the information somewhere else?

  Is it better to have a conference?

  Is my child lying to me?

  Am I teacher too?

  Posted in teaching | 3 Comments | Tagged english teacher, parent emails, teacher, teacher problems, teaching

• A Mrs. Ram’s Jams Teaching Woe: Grading Papers over Thanksgiving Break

  Posted at 1:07 am by Mrs. Ram Jam, on November 24, 2018

  

  In previous posts, I’ve declared I don’t grade at home, but I’ve just proved myself a liar.  

  During this Thanksgiving break, I’ve spent at least 10 hours grading four class sets of five-paragraph argument essays. And I’m not even done yet. Ten more essays wait in my backpack. Hours ago, my resolve to knock them out crumbled like an overbaked Christmas sugar cookie.

  So why exactly am I stuck grading for hours while I’m on vacation?

  1. I can’t get ahead this year. No matter what I do, my workload just increases. For starters, I have two different preps. Then for major writing assignments, I allow students to revise for better grades, so I’m constantly regrading. I’m also battling with finding time to reteach skills to students who need extra help, respond to parent emails, analyze data, etc. I barely found time to start grading these essays last week at work, so I took them home over the break in an effort to not feel so overwhelmed at school on Monday.  
  2. It’s taking me longer to grade because the grammar is cringeworthy. Y’all. It’s that bad. Run-ons are an epidemic. Rambling is the norm, and the awkward syntax is fascinating, horrifying, and soul-crushing. I’m either choking down sentences that make no sense, or drowning in independent clauses comprised of millions of tiny words that say nothing. Normally, I could grade all these essays in seven hours, tops. But essays written with poorly constructed sentences are more time consuming for me to grade, and an inordinate number of them fall into this category. Why? Why? Why? P.S. When did the random capitalization of common nouns become a thing?     

  Whew. I feel better. Thanks for letting me vent. Now does anyone want to grade those last ten essays for me so I can relax with the latest Jodi Picoult novel? Pretty please?  

  Posted in teaching, Uncategorized, writing | 0 Comments | Tagged blogging, blogs, teacher problems, teachers on break, teaching, writing

• Chronic Illness: Playing Phone Tag with Doctors’ Offices

  Posted at 5:32 pm by Mrs. Ram Jam, on June 8, 2018

  

  Because of chronic illnesses (fibromyalgia, Meniere’s disease, Raynaud’s, and IBS), I frequently contact my general practitioner, rheumatologist, ENT, and gastroenterologist.  Unfortunately, talking to someone alive the first go-round never happens.

  My doctors work for large hospital systems. For patients, no direct lines to a specific doctor’s office exist. I call the main hospital phone, listen to an automated message, press a bunch of numbers, get transferred to the doctor’s nurse’s line, and leave a message.  

  I completely sympathize. Medical professionals are overloaded just like teachers and can’t be constantly available therefore they use technology to filter and take messages.

  Also, I’m not calling to get free medical advice over the phone. I see my gastroenterologist every six weeks and my rheumatologist and ENT every six months. I schedule these appointments weeks or months in advance because it takes weeks or months to actually get an appointment. When my health suddenly shifts and I need specialist care, I call to make an appointment and often none are available. That’s when I resort to phone tag with doctors’ nurses because my doctors have expressly stated I can call and they will help via phone.    

  During the school year, it’s even harder to get in contact with doctors because I’m at work and in class before doctors’ offices open, I can’t call while I’m teaching, and my first break isn’t until 12:45 p.m. Then it normally takes an hour or two (or 24) for a return call.  (Again, I don’t expect an instantaneous return call. It’s like students expecting me to grade 100 five paragraph essays magically as soon as they get handed in. Not happening.)

  And if I miss the return call, then it’s necessary to repeat the aforementioned process because 98 percent of the time my call is returned when:

  • I’m using the bathroom, and my phone is on the kitchen counter, halfway across the house;
  • I’m driving through a school zone (No I don’t have bluetooth in my car, and yes it is still legal in Louisiana to be on a handheld device while driving–but not in school zones.);
  • I’m in class, and answering phones while teaching is severely frowned upon. #TeacherProblems;  
  • It’s my off period, and I could answer my phone, but I don’t get service in my classroom so by the time I sprint to an area with service, I’ve missed the call.  
  • I’m speaking with a different doctor’s nurse, and it’s rude to say, “Can you hold on for a sec?”;
  • Little Thing, watching Youtube Kids, has my phone and hangs up purposely instead of answering;
  • I’ve accidentally left my phone in the car for two minutes;  
  • I’ve forgotten to switch my phone off silent after the workday ends or after I wake up;

  OR

  • It’s 3:58 on a Friday afternoon, any bullet from above (except number three) conspires against me, and the doctor’s office closes at four–so I’m shit out of luck until Monday and the whole vicious cycle repeats.     

  I hate playing phone tag with the doctor’s office. The whole process is a colossal fiasco.  

  It’s 2018 people. I challenge the world to figure out a better way for doctors’ offices to communicate with patients.  A three or four phone call interaction per individual instance is comically ineffective.

  (I’ve even tried direct messaging doctors’ offices through apps like MyChart, but I’ve never gotten a written message back. The nurse calls in response to the emailed message. Go figure.)

  Surely the doctors’ nurses find themselves frustrated, too. Returning patient phone calls can’t be their only professional responsibility.

  How much time and money are wasted per salaried professional because of calling the same patient repeatedly over the same issue?

  Maybe it’s minimal, but the notion nags me–just like the fact that they’re never available when I am.    

  Posted in chronic pain, fibromyalgia, meniere's disease, Uncategorized, writing | 2 Comments | Tagged blogging, calling the doctor, chronic illness, chronic pain, fibromyalgia, meniere's disease, teacher problems, teaching, writing

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